I think we need to address a big piece of the puzzle of an organized life: feeling good. And more specifically – feeling good about the way we look.  I have noticed with my clients, myself, and other women in my life, that feeling confident about the way you look is one of the ingredients in an organized life. For some it might be just a little, like a pinch of salt in a recipe; and for others it might be a bigger deal, like a cup of sugar. It gets to be different for everyone. But I want to talk about this with you today because I don’t want you to omit feeling good on the OUTSIDE from your personal recipe of a happy, organized life. Things just don’t turn out right when you leave out this ingredient, just like when you leave out essential ingredients in a recipe and things don’t turn out right. 

Earlier this year I heard a personal stylist say “the gap between your current and future self closes quickly when you line up your wardrobe with your future self.” She was claiming that if we dress like the person we want to be, we become that person so much more quickly. I would say that there are definitely other things besides your wardrobe or appearance that help close the gap where you are now and where you want to be, but think of how you feel on a good hair day or when you’re wearing a new outfit. There is added confidence that helps us feel good in a whole new way. The way you look isn’t EVERYTHING…but it is something.

So in this episode we are talking about a few things you can do to feel good about yourself on the outside. This may feel a little intimidating if you feel like you’ve let things really get away from you for the last several years. Or you may think “I’ll do some of these things later, after I lose some weight.” Or maybe you don’t think you have any money you can spend on yourself, so this doesn’t really apply to you. It’s easy to find reasons to delay, and they may seem like good ones, but you’ll never win the way you hope to if you neglect this part of your self care.  

 

So here are three ways to help you feel good from the outside in:

 

1. Get rid of the old clothes that don’t fit 

There is a statistic that says we wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time. I’ve considered this as I look at the clothes hanging in my closet and I think that is pretty accurate. Take a look in your closet the next time you are in it and notice how many things you don’t wear very often. See if that statistic is true.

I think there are various reasons we hang onto old clothes, but I am going to ask you to get rid of a very specific category of old clothes – the ones that don’t fit.

One of my coaches has said, “When your clothes don’t fit, it’s the clothes that need to be fired – not the body.”

Another of my coaches has said, “It is abuse to yourself to make yourself wear clothes that don’t fit or are uncomfortable.” In other words, everyone deserves clothes that make them feel good – inside and out.”

I challenge you to clean out your old clothes that don’t fit anymore. And if you are having a hard time letting them go, one of the old tricks I’ve taught clients is to put the clothes in a box or bag and move them into the basement, garage or storage unit. Put some physical distance between you and the clothes, and it’s crazy but somehow you will emotionally distance yourself as well. And then after a few months, when you realize you’ve lived just fine without them, it’s easier to cut that final cord and give them away.

Remember, “the space for what you want is filled up with what you’ve already settled for instead” (Stephan Paul.)  Let’s not settle for clothes that don’t feel good. That is some of the worst clutter because it gets in the way of you feeling good about yourself.

2. Buy yourself something new.

Think of how you feel when you are dressed in something you feel good in. Think about the way your kids beam on the first day of school when they’re wearing that new outfit, those new shoes. 

Of course, the way you look isn’t everything, but as we’ve said several times in this episode, it is something. 

Maybe you can decide to get yourself some new things every season. Make a list of what you’d love to get. Look for ways to make it work. Can you cut back here and there? Can you pick up one thing each month or each quarter? 

It doesn’t even have to be clothes. Once I needed to refresh some makeup, and got some new primer and foundation and learned a few new techniques, and I felt like I glowed for months afterwards. So even a new pair of earrings, some new lip gloss – just something to remind yourself that you matter, and you deserve to feel good. 

3. Implement some new physical self-care

At the time of this recording I am 47, and for the last few years, I have been noticing that things just don’t look the way they used to. I always said I would accept aging with ease and grace, and I am still committed to that. But I’ve realized that to feel good about myself, I have had to up my game with self-care.

For example, I now take the time to stretch every morning and before and after workouts because if I don’t, my body isn’t very happy with me. Another example –  Where I didn’t give much thought to sunscreen when I was younger, I now wear a hat and sunscreen. I miss the tan, but it feels so good to be taking good care of myself. 

There are SO MANY ways we can implement better physical self-care, and it’s going to look different for everyone. Better sleep, more movement in your day, flossing your teeth, drinking more water, cutting back on sugar or soda – whatever it is, it’s crazy how much taking a little better care of your body can make you feel.

And what I love about this third suggestion is the way it is such an investment in yourself. Taking care of your body has a compound effect on the way you look, the way you feel, and therefore your confidence in yourself, it’s never going to be outdated! Over time you may change some products or some workouts or whatever, but when you take care of your body you are investing in health and beauty that can’t be attained in any other way except by steady, consistent effort over time.

 

So what?

Feeling good is the best gift you can give to your family and others who love you. Everyone wins when you feel good – because you are constantly pouring from your own pitcher. So let’s replenish what’s in there. You’ve seen how you feel when you have a clean house…now see what happens when you look in the mirror or think about how you are showing up. Feeling good  about the way you look can be a giant springboard for doing other things that can help you feel good. 

An organized life has many puzzle pieces, and today for our so what moment, I want to ask you, so what are you doing about how you feel about yourself? How can you feel good – or at least better – about the way you look? Would it help to clean out old clothes that make you feel guilty or inadequate because you don’t fit in them anymore? Could buying something new that makes you feel great create some momentum? Can you start taking care of yourself in a new way and prove to yourself that you matter as much as everyone else you take care of?